How (NOT) to motivate students?

Okay, not my usual post but I feel like this is worth sharing.  

This image on pinterest intended to (apparently) motivate middle schoolers 

struck me as not only useless but potentially harmful:

https://pin.it/736vfgiw37tmos

Image shows dry-erase board with the following message written: "10 Things that Take 0 Talent, but will get you 100% respect: 1. Being on time 2. Work Ethic 3. Effort 4. Body Language 5. Energy 6. Attitude 7. Passion 8. Being Coachable. 9. Doing Extra 10. Being Prepared"

So, I get it. We're trying to motivate people to show up, do their best, and achieve greater things than they thought possible. It's been saved over 50,000+ times on pinterest and there's an etsy listing for a poster print. For neurotypical folks, maybe this offers some inspiration... ways they can do well and continue to make a notable effort when school is tough. 

But these "0 talent" things actually take something else. Something called "Executive function skills. "Being on time? Being prepared? Having energy? Being coachable? Those require a student to have the cognitive ability, the opportunity to develop executive skills, and the resources to apply said skills. Many students with cognitive deficits and disabilities struggle exceptionally with executive skills. ADHD, depression, anxiety, physical disabilities, nutritional deficits, socio-economic status,  and many other factors contribute to these "0 talent" skills--or lack thereof. 

So, let's put on our "empathy hats" and pause for a moment.  

You're a middle school student with executive functioning deficits.

Your mom got you up early this morning to get ready on time.

You're groggy and exhausted because your meds haven't kicked in yet.

You go in circles trying to find matching socks, settling for a "close-enough" pair.

In the time you spent searching for your socks, you lost the pile of clothes you had ready to wear and have to start all over again.  It's middle school, so what you wear kind of matters.

Finally you find clothes, slightly discouraged because they were not what you wanted.

You forgot to brush your teeth.

Mom is hollering to get your stuff and get out the door.

You have to jam your stuff into your backpack because you didn't put it back in after doing homework last night.

You rush to the bus and barely make it... getting on last means squeezing into an already filled seat.

As the bus pulls away, you realize that the assignment you finished and printed out is still sitting on the printer.

Defeated, you slump against the students next to you in the bus seat and vow to do your best anyway.

At some point, you also realize that you forgot to eat breakfast.

Your stomach flips as you remember the awkward thing you said at lunch yesterday, and you wonder if anyone else will remember it today.

You head to your locker and it won't open.  Frustrated, you realize you're trying to put in last year's code.  When you get it open, your unwashed gym clothes and 2 empty water bottles fall out.

Grabbing a fistful of the papers from your backpack, which are now in some sort of chaotic origami form, you stuff your backpack awkwardly into the locker and slam it shut.  

Thankfully, your meds have kicked in and you had a split second to remember to grab your notebook and pens before you lock the door.

While you head toward class, your stomach drops again.  Your teacher is not going to be impressed that your assignment is sitting on the print tray at home.  You wonder if he will even believe you anymore.

You walk into class just as the bell rings (first win of the day!) and your polished, beaming teacher is standing in front of this sign: 10 Things That Take 0 Talent.......

The thing is, kids like the one described above, get more negative feedback than their peers.  In school alone, a child with ADHD could receive 20,000 corrective or negative comments by the time he or she is age 10.

And it's not for lack of trying.  They are told to do their best but continue to receive negative feedback which is received more harshly due to emotional dysregulation caused by ADHD.  Not only do they hear about their failure more often, it actually stings more because of the ADHD.

Ask yourself: would you stay at a job where you are told 3 times an hour that your best isn't good enough?  Would you stay in a relationship in which you are told YOU aren't good enough?  So it's no wonder that some kids with executive skills deficits appear to try less or even quit trying altogether.  

I sincerely hope, if you've made it this far, I won't even have to say it.  But I came here to say it.  So I'm gonna say it:

Signs like the one above are DEmotivating, DEmoralizing, ableist garbage which hurts kids who already wonder why they can't do the simplest things that "everyone" seems to do with "0 talent."  

Hell, I'm a college-educated adult two-thirds of the way to an advanced master's degree, and I fail at no less than 3 of those 10 things every day.  Honestly, who looks at all of those and says "Yep! Those take no talent at all!"? 

So, in the spirit of solution-focused thinking, here are some alternatives:

Image shows a rabbit with a large carrot growing underground with a small leaf above and a rabbit with a tiny carrot growing underground with a large leaf section above from "Motivation Stories."

Black background with text: Challenge Accepted

Photograph of Albert Einstein with text quote: "Education is not the learning of facts, but training the mind to think."

Photograph of man standing at edge of mountain peak with text: Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying 'I will try again tomorrow.' -Mary Anne Radmacher.

So, if you're looking to support students in their efforts to learn... 

if you want to help them navigate the world and feel valuable as human beings... 

(which I believe you do; 

I can't image anyone wanting to truly motivate someone to succeed if they didn't care about that person)

...Start with creating an environment of acceptance and support.  

Don't lower expectations, 

but let your students know that you are alongside them for the journey.

"Resilience depends on supportive, responsive relationships and mastering a set of capabilities that can help us respond and adapt to adversity in healthy ways." -Shonkoff.